The Honeymooners
by nannygirl
Summary: Newlyweds are known for being 'lovey dovey' with each other, but this isn't exactly the case for Newlyweds Fez and Laurie. Will their night end with them apart or together?


_**Disclaimer: **__I own nothing. Not That 70's Show, not The Carpenters, not I Love Lucy. I own nothing!_

_**Author's Note: **__Hello All! So as you know it's a new month already and that mean it's time for a new fic from that poll I had ages ago…yes I know I still haven't finished it but this is the second to last on the list…there is one more left to do but I'm still debating on doing it or not. Anywoo…this fic is a Fez and Laurie fic. I always thought the would make a really cute couple, they do seem to fit each other…they do both have…'needs' lol and I'm convinced that if Lisa Robin Kelly had stayed on the show they would've kept Fez and Laurie married a little longer, maybe they would have even kept them married and then there wouldn't be any Fez and Jackie in season 8! See now aren't you all Fez and Laurie fans now? lol Well whether you are a Fez and Laurie fan or not, I hope you can enjoy this fic as I really did have fun writing it, and it's not all gushy romantic-y/ pervert-y as you might think a Fez and Laurie fic might go. It takes place a few nights after they got married so that Fez could stay in the country…and that's really pretty much all you need to know before reading. You can picture which ever Laurie you wish when reading, personally I thought of LRK as I always do when writing Laurie. But I'm rambling, sorry. Hope you like this one shot and please review if you have the time! Thanks and Enjoy!_

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The Honeymooners

It was a regular Monday evening and while most people who had just come home at the end of the day would have sluggishly dragged themselves into their bedroom and then flop down onto their bed for a much needed sleep, Fez was happily singing to himself as he made his way though the hallway and to the first door on his right. The foreign man was in such a good mood, he was practically skipping as he sang one of his favorite songs.

"_So they sprinkled moon dust in your hair of golden starlight in your eyes of blue!"_ he sang out loud as he swung the bedroom door open and began to walk inside as he sang his song to the woman who was seated infront of her mirrored vanity and had yet to turn to face him.

"_That is why all the boys in town, all the boys in town."_ He created an echo as he walked up behind the young woman and leaned down placing his hands on her shoulders as he continued his melody.

"_Follow you, follow you, all around, all around._" He sang with his thick accent, moving his head from one side of the person his was serenading to the other, with each echo he created.

"_Just like me, they long to be, close to yoooouuuu!_" he finished before placing a loving kiss on his bride's cheek.

His bride however did look at all happy. Her expression remained showing her aggravation since the moment he'd walked in and her annoyance had only increased as he grew closer and his singing went on. There was not a trace of a smile, not even when his lips pecked her cheek.

"And how is my beautiful bride today?"

Laurie stared back at her overly happy husband, with a slight snarl, "Oh yeah, we're still doing that married thing."

"That's right." Fez happily nodded as he gave Laurie a one armed hug, "Till death do us part!"

"Yeah, about that...I'm taking tonight off." She said as if it were the most obvious and common thing in the world.

"What?" the foreigner screeched as he practically jumped up with surprise, "You can't do that, we're married!"

"Yeah and marriage takes work." Laurie began to explain, keeping her cool as she saw no point in arguing—she knew she'd get her way, "And all work and no play will make this _bride_ go away."

Fear and concern soon crossed over Fez's face. He didn't want Laurie to leave and bail on their marriage, particularly not this soon into their marriage; then the government would know their main reason for tying the knot and he would be shipped back to his home country. It wasn't that he didn't want to return back to where he'd spent most of his life, he just wasn't ready to leave this new and exciting life here in America especially not right after getting married!

"No, no, no Laurie don't go away." He practically begged, back beside her and holding onto her arm, "_Please_…you won't even have to go out tonight we can play here! Oo we can play _Chutes and Ladders_ or my favorite _Candy Land_. Oh! Or we could _do it_. That would be fun."

Laurie frowned looking back and forth from Fez's smirking face to his hands on her arm, "Yeah, for _you_."

"Yes, yes it would." Fez agreed still smiling as he tired to speak in a sophisticated voice.

"Forget it, Fez." Laurie firmly said as she managed to pull herself out of the young man's grip and then walked over to her bed to retrieve her over the shoulder purse, "I have a date with Edward Matthews and I'm keeping it." A smirk of her own soon appeared on Laurie's face, "You know what they say about guys with long names."

Trying to figure out what it was she was talking about Fez's knitted his brows together and began to think.

"They take a long time to sign their names?" he guessed.

The blonde shook her head, her evil like smile still in place, "_Noo_. I'll give you a hint though. His name isn't the only thing that's _long_."

Still puzzled by this 'riddle' Fez pondered for several more seconds before the light bulb inside his head turned on and he realized what Laurie was now talking about.

"Oohhh! Ha ha, I get it…" he said with a nod and smile, happy to have figured out the puzzle, but the nodding and matching grin soon disappeared when he remembered how long, better yet, not long his own name was. "Aye, no…"

Satisfied with the work she'd done and also managing to get Fez's mind off her leaving for her date, Laurie slung her purse strap over her shoulder and headed for the bedroom door, but not before turning around and giving her husband another smirk, "Don't wait up, _Fez._"

With a slight saddened pout remaining in place on his face, Fez watched as his wife got ready to leave for her date. Her hand was already on the doorknob when he realized he could feel sorry for himself and his short name later, if he wanted to keep Laurie from going on her date and keep her home with him he had to do something _now_.

"Laurie, you cannot go!"

Rolling her eyes, Laurie turned around and gave an uninterested look yet still asked her question, "And why not?"

"Because!" Fez shouted, before drifting off for a second or two as he tried to come up with a reason or excuse, anything, "We made vows!"

"Yeah, so?" she asked not seeing any reason as to why Fez had said this, "Never once in those vows did I say I wouldn't date anyone else while we were married."

Fez's eyebrows rose up an inch or two as he heard Laurie's reply and soon he found him nodding in approval, "That's true." He agreed, "Very good point."

Laurie smiled a ditzy smile back as she shrugged her shoulders and gave a quick 'thanks.'

"But we are married Laurie, married people do not go on dates with other people." Fez protested, still trying to keep her there with him.

"All the married people I know do." The blonde stated as a reminder but as she remembered another detail she added it in as well, "Well not so much married people, but married _men_."

Staring back at Laurie, Fez tried to come up with another point he could make and would be able to help him win this argument, but it wasn't very easy. It seemed like every point he made Laurie was able to twist around into working in her favor. Fez was now beginning to see why it was that Eric referred to her as Satan.

"But we are _married_!" Fez repeated once again, this time stressing the last word as if it would make a great deal of difference for the times before, "Remember?"

Laurie rolled her blue eyes once again; she was tired of this repeated statement, if it hadn't worked the two times before why did he insist on saying it a third time?

"Yeah Fez, I remember." She admitted in an annoyed tone of voice that for some reason caused a grin to break out on Fez's face, "And if I remember correctly, us getting married is also the thing that gave Daddy a heart attack."

Instantly Fez's smile dropped and he eyed his wife almost suspiciously, "You are going to bring that up every time we have a fight so that way you will win, aren't you?"

"That's the plan." Laurie replied with an innocent smile and a tilt of her head.

"Fine! Go out on your date with Mr. Eddie Matthews!" Fez huffed in attempt to make Laurie's date have a shorter name but not doing the greatest job, "I will just stay here all alone in our little apartment and eat cold, day old leftovers."

Irritated by her husband's whining, Laurie placed her hands on her hips and glared over at him, "First of all Fez, for the _millionth time_, this is not our apartment. It is _my_ room and you're only staying here because we're "married"…and you've been sleeping on the floor since day one! Second, you can quit with the leftovers sob fest, you and I both know you'll end up eating whatever concoction Mom cooks up for dinner."

Fez gave a faint smile as he sat himself on the lower right corner of the bed, "It is meatloaf tonight."

As she shook her head from left to right Laurie turned back around and grabbed the golden colored doorknob before twisting it to the left. She hated meatloaf and her mother making it was going on her already lengthy list of reasons for why she was so happy to get out of the house that night.

"You're not going out dressed in that, are you?"

With a familiar snarl upon her face, Laurie turned herself around to look back over at Fez, "You're my husband Fez, not my father."

"I know." The young foreign man nodded, "But I did not think you were going to wear that on your date."

Laurie looked down at her outfit; wedged sandals, high waisted tight fitting jeans and an even tighter violet colored baby doll shirt. She didn't see a problem with it though, except maybe that her top could have been left in the dryer a little longer.

She looked back up at the foreign man, her frown still in place, "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?"

"Nothing, nothing…"Fez replied truthfully, his eyes traveling down to her t-shirt for a few seconds before nervously shifting back up to Laurie's eyes.

However, unlike the times before when he'd stared at a woman's chest and then looked back up at her face he was not met with an angry scowl nor a feisty hit on his upper arm, instead Laurie smiled back, happy to see the size of her shirt really wouldn't be as much of a problem as she thought it would be.

Clearing his throat and still feeling nervous by the unexpected reaction of Laurie's, Fez continued with what he had to say, "I just thought you were going to wear something else."

"Like what?" Laurie questioned, sounding only half interested.

"Like that silky blue button-down blouse you have in our closet." He answered before going on to explain his reasons, "It is very tight fitting so it will show off all glorious curves. It has buttons so you can leave all the buttons done when Mr. Red sees you and then undo a few when you are on your date."

Laurie thought over his words and couldn't help but realize that Fez was really on to something.

"It is soft and silky so it will be nice to the touch making Eddie want to touch more, it will go with your shoes and purse…and it's blue. Blue brings out your eyes." Fez finished in a small voice as if embarrassed by his last comment.

The corners of Laurie's mouth tugged upwards for a split second or two. She was actually touched by the thing Fez had taken into consideration when suggesting what top she should change into. Even choosing a color that he thought brought out her eyes…more than half the time the guys she dated barely noticed the color of her eyes.

Shifting her gaze towards her closet Laurie could see through the small crack of the opened door, the blouse Fez was talking about, just waiting for her. She gave a shrug figuring it wouldn't hurt if she changed her top, after all what was going to happen? She'd change her shirt and the new one would make her look hideously ugly? Ha! Like that could happen, she'd yet to find a blouse in any store that did to her yet.

Laurie then removed her purse from her shoulder hung it on the back of the seat infront of her vanity. She made her way to her closet before opening the door and turning to give her back to Fez, she grabbed the bottom of her purple shirt and pulled it over her head. The second her top was off, she heard a faint gasp and a mischievous grin played on her lips. She knew who'd made the sound and had a good feeling that the fact that she only wore a bra on rare occasions—and this day not being one of those occasions—played a big part in the gasp being made.

Since she hadn't turned around yet, Fez could probably only see the sight of her bare back, but the full length mirror that hung on the inside of her closet door must have been giving him a good of her front side as well.

With her devious smile still in place, she used her mirror to her own advantage and looked at Fez's reflection. Her smile grew as she saw that his gaze was fixated in her direction. And while she had no intention to call off her date and stay home with her 'husband' or do anything else with him, Laurie saw this as a good opportunity for some teasing; after all the best and funnest part of teasing someone was when you had no intention of doing anything else with them.

"Oh silly me." She said in a small innocent voice, "I forgot to put on a bra today, didn't I Fez?"

Fez remained mute but still managed to nodded his head, this caused a small giggle to escape Laurie's lips.

Looking at Fez's reflection she gave a seductive look as she spoke to him in a similar tone, "Do you like what you see, Fez?"

"Yes." He replied, his voice sounding a bit shaky, "Is it real?"

"Of course they're real…what do you mean 'it?'" she asked suddenly looking at Fez's reflection and noticing that though his eyes were looking in her direction it wasn't her he was looking at. She grabbed the top she'd just take off and used it to cover herself as she turned to face him, "What are you looking at?"

"This." said Fez as he stood up from his seat and quickly walked over to the closet and reached up for a forgotten item on the top shelf.

Laurie scrunched up her face with both confusion and some anger, how he be more interested in _that _than in her? "That piece of junk?"

"Piece of junk!" he exclaimed while examining the cube shaped item, "This is a portable TV!"

"Yeah Fez I know what it is, it's mine remember?"

"Where did you get it from?" Fez asked still fascinated with the device.

Laurie shrugged as she took this time that Fez wasn't watching her to put on the blue blouse he'd suggested, "Mom and Daddy got it for me a couple of years back."

"Does it still work?" he asked in a hopeful voice.

"I don't know, maybe." She replied as she debated if she should button up the top button or not, "They gave it to me as a Christmas gift when I was in college and then a couple of months later…well you know what happened."

Fez nodded understandingly, "Yes they flunked you out even though you were sleeping with your professors. Those sonsofbitches should have given you an 'A' There is just no justice!"

"I know, right?" Laurie quickly agreed, surprised to finally find someone who saw the situation the way she did.

Nodding at his wife again, Fez looked at the small TV and then back up at Laurie, "May I?" he asked pointing at the item in his hands.

"Go for it." She replied dryly, going back to her uncaring state.

Not having to be told twice, Fez gleefully took the portable set with him and bounced himself onto the full-sized bed. He made himself comfortable, kicking off his shoes, out stretching his legs and settling his back against the headboard before placing the set on his lap—his happy grin never leaving his face. Meanwhile Laurie shook her head at his antics, watching him try to figure out how to turn the device on.

She finished fixing her blouse, deciding to go with Fez's advice and button all six button until she was out of her father's sight, but Laurie decide to fix her hair once again after she'd frizzed it out abit when she'd changed tops.

"Oh happy day! It works!" Fez shouted triumphantly as if he'd just created the machine himself.

Laurie remained seated infront of her mirror as she fluffed her hair just abit more, "Great. Good luck trying to find something good on there though."

Fez looked over at his wife to give a silent 'thank you' with his smile but stopped himself from doing so as he saw her grab one of her various perfume bottles and raised it to the side of her neck. He wrinkled his nose before speaking.

"No, do not put on that one."

"Why not?" Laurie asked, she really wasn't use to people stopping her from doing things and making her change her mind but Fez had done good this last time with her blouse, she thought she'd hear him out this time around. "What's wrong with this perfume?"

"It's too sweet and flowery." The foreign man explained while keeping his eyes on the portable television, trying to get a clear channel, "The round pink one is more you. It has the hint of sweetness but is at the same time daring and is very much seductive and sexy."

Laurie smiled at the compliment but before she could speak, Fez interrupted with another joyful announcement.

"_I Love Lucy!"_ he cheered happily, his eyes now completely fixated on the black and white small screen, "Oh and how I do love Lucy. And Ricky. And Ethel. And Fred too!" he added with a laugh, "Oh and _M&M's_ too!"

Fez then proceeded to reach into his pant pocket and pull out a bag of the bite sized candy. Laurie caught these actions while she sprayed on the perfume Fez had recommend.

"Is candy the only thing you carry in your pockets?"

"Mostly, yes." Fez answered with a nod shy smile, "There is some money too…but I only use that to buy more candy."

Laurie didn't know what to do with that piece of information, roll her eyes at it or let out a small laugh; she ended up doing a mixture of the two.

It was several minutes that had past and Laurie remained in her room still seated at her vanity. She knew that with Fez occupied with the portable TV it was the perfect opportunity to leave without being noticed, but something stopped her from getting up. Her date could always wait a few extra minutes she told herself while applying little touchups to her make-up. And while she stayed in her room with her husband she heard the same noise, the episode and lines from the 1950's sitcom, the roaring laughter from the audience on the show, and the laughter from the audience member in her own room.

It seemed like as the episode went on and new jokes were made Fez's laughter became harder and louder. It had long ago started to annoy Laurie; yet she still didn't leave. Instead she stood up from her place infront of her mirror and strutted over to the bed, taking a seat and trying to act casual as she took off her shoes, getting ready to change those as well.

Fez never noticed his wife take a seat on the other side of the bed; his chocolate brown eyes were glued to the miniature sized television as he laughed heartedly at the classic scene between Ricky Ricardo and Fred Mertz play off.

"Is this like the first time you've ever seen this show or something?" she asked with an annoyed frown in place.

"Oh no, I have seen this show thousands of times! This is my favorite episode." He began to explain and then pointed at the small screen, "Look Ricky is going to slip and fall right now…"

Leaning closer Laurie took a peek at the portable TV and not three seconds later Ricky Ricardo slipped and fell to the ground as he and his friend and landlord Fred Mertz tried to scoop up the rice that was over flowing from the pot on the stovetop. Laurie let out her own laugh at the action while Fez—even though he knew what was going to happen—laughed like he'd never seen it before.

"I remember this one…" Laurie began to say, a small genuine smile starting to form, "It's the one where they switch places and Lucy and Ethel go work at that candy factory right?"

Fez turned his attention away from _I Love Lucy_, since it had gone on commercial anyway, and he stared wide eyed at his bride, "You watch _I Love Lucy_ too?"

"Yeah, I use to I mean." She stared to say, "It was when I was younger and hadn't started dating yet. I was usually up late and I'd sneak down to the living room or basement to watch TV. _I Love Lucy_ was always my favorite, I didn't go back to bed until I saw an episode." Laurie shared smiling at the memory, but soon shrugged it off, "But then I started dating and…well I haven't really kept up with what's on television anymore."

Not knowing what to say, Fez nodded in an understanding manner.

Laurie titled her head, "What about you?"

"Oh, I keep up with all the shows that are on now." Fez replied, "I am like a walking _TV Guide_! On Sundays at…"

"No." Laurie interrupted as she held back a laugh, "I mean when did you start watching _I Love Lucy_? In…wherever it is you're from?"

Fez shook his head, "Oh no, I never saw it in my home country. We do not have television there."

"Bummer." Laurie stated.

"Yes." Fez nodded again before he went on to answer her question, "I started watching _I Love Lucy_ when I first moved here…late at night too!" he exclaimed happily and Laurie's own smile grew a bit as well.

"My body was not use to the time change yet and I would be awake for hours sometimes, then one night I went down stairs and turned on the TV, but did not turn on the volume so I would not wake my host parents up. Then little by little I would turn the volume up each night and each night when I turned on the TV it would always be on the same show, _I Love Lucy._ It was even funny without the sound! But even funnier with the sound." Fez rambled on and then paused to look at Laurie's face.

He half expected her to now be wearing a very annoyed expression on her face and the other half expected her to have already been out the door; so he was very much shocked to see that she was still seated beside him, actually listening to what he was saying.

"I watched Lucy and friends every night for the first few months I was in America It made me laugh and feel comfortable and more at home…" Fez revealed, "And I learned most of my English from watching Ricky."

"Huh." Laurie said at the new piece of information, she then nodded her head, "That explains a lot."

As the comment went over his head, Fez smiled and nodded along. It was at this same moment that he noticed how close Laurie had moved towards him and had yet to move away—they weren't snuggling, cuddling up close but they were closer than they had been since that night in Kelso's van. Looking over at her and seeing that her attention was still on the TV, waiting for the show to return from commercial, he decided to ask a question that had been on his mind but he'd been slightly afraid to ask.

"Laurie?" he called, grabbing her attention, "Why did you agree to marry me?"

The question caught Laurie off guard and she was more than surprised that he'd even brought it up; still she knew he deserved an answer. An answer that was held the truth. She looked away from the mini-TV and over at Fez.

"I knew how much you wanted to stay in America…you really love it a lot more than actual citizens and I thought it was unfair for the government to make you leave." She explained in a kind and gentle voice that was almost scary to hear her use, especially since she sounded like she really meant it all, "And I also knew we would be all sad and crying all over the place if you left…"

Fez smiled, he'd never thought what his friends would do if he had been deported…and they'd never told him either. And she said 'we'…'we' must have included herself.

"Plus the getting wedding gifts is an extra bonus." Laurie was quick to add with a ditzy smile. "Don't forget our deal. Anything we get is mine."

"Right." He quickly agreed, "Unless it is a portable TV because I want one of these babies!" he declared pointing his finger at the box in his lap, "Oo especially if it is a colored one. I would love to see _I Love Lucy_ in color."

This time it was Laurie who nodded as she showed that she agreed while keeping her smile in place, before she remembered another part of her answer she'd left out.

"And you know…I was bored."

Fez nodded once again abit sadly but the smile that soon appeared on his face showed his change of emotion, "Laurie." He called getting her attention, "I'm glad you were bored."

Laurie returned the smile, "Yeah…me too."

The newlywed couple sat on the bed in silence; the groom's eyes on the TV screen and the bride's on her groom. Then before either of them knew it Laurie began moving even closer to Fez's form.

"Scoot over, hubby." She playfully ordered.

Fez did as he was told, scooting towards the left to make more room for his wife, but couldn't help the scowl that remained on his face, "But I thought you were excited for your date with Edward Matthews."

"It doesn't sound so much fun anymore." She replied truthfully and then looked over at Fez, "Besides his real name isn't really Edward. It's Ed. Not even Eddie, just _Ed_. "

"Oh ho ho. Oh poor, Ed." Fez said with a laugh; at least Fez was one letter longer than that! Suddenly a thought entered his mind and he looked over at his wife with a smug grin, "You know Laurie, my real name in my native language is very long."

"Fez," she began to say wearing a deadpan look, "you don't have to tell me." She finished with a knowing grin.

Feeling a boost in his confidence Fez let his grin grow even larger. He then looked at his bag of candy and offered some to his wife, Laurie smiled and proceeded to reach in and grab a few of the multicolored candies before resting her head on his shoulder just as _I Love Lucy_ returned from commercial and the famous chocolate factory scene began.

The End

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_**Author's Note: **__So what'd you think? Good? Bad? Great? Terrible? Please lemme know in a review! I'd love to hear from you!_

_P.S. I'm sorry if I kinda overdid it with the 'I Love Lucy' stuff but I am a major fan of the show and…come on it's 'I Love Lucy!' And The episode Fez and Laurie were watching was of course my favorite 'Job Switching' classic no? And if you have no idea what I'm talking about, go you tube it now and be ready fro some laughs!_

_P.S.S. Sorry, I know I'm talking waaayy to much must be that cup of coffee I drank just now, but I also wanted to shared with you that I didn't add I Love Lucy into the story just because I'm a fan, but also because Wilmer Valderrama is too! He's also said that watching it helped him learn to speak English, so I thought I'd do that with Fez too. Fits no?_

_Until next time, thanks for reading, hope you liked, please review and lemme know what you think, see you next time, take care, and have a nice day!_


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